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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22527535">Romantic Advice</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/writergirl3005/pseuds/writergirl3005'>writergirl3005</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood &amp; Manga</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, rewritten fic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 12:01:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>317</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22527535</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/writergirl3005/pseuds/writergirl3005</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Romantic Advice from the Homoculi is .. not very helpful to say the least. Based on a headcanon by howtotrainyouralchemist.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Romantic Advice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Headcanon that when Bradley met Mrs. Bradley, he fell head over heels in love with the strong, capable, and hotheaded young lady. He went to his fellow homunculi for help because he was romantically incapable, but basically the reactions were either "kill her!", "eat her", "stab her", "rob her", or *snore*, he gave up and tried to flirt on his own. Needless to say he got slapped. - howtotrainyouralchemist</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Homunculi stared at him as if they couldn't quite figure out what he was saying.</p><p> </p><p>"Wrath, can you just repeat what you said?" asked Envy.</p><p> </p><p>Wrath glared at his siblings, "I said I need some advice," he said through gritted teeth. "I just met this woman, and I really want to impress her."</p><p> </p><p>Envy shook his head(Or was it her head? Wrath could never quite figure out). "Yea, that's what I thought you said."</p><p> </p><p>Pride rolled his eyes. "Honestly Wrath, I don't see the need for this. She would be a distraction. Just kill her."</p><p> </p><p>Sloth, predictably, answered with a snore. Wrath snorted. Sloth was never any help unless he was digging that tunnel.</p><p> </p><p>Gluttony licked his lips. "She'll be very delicious, humans always are! You can eat her!"</p><p> </p><p>"No!" yelled Wrath. He pushed down the urge to stab Gluttony with his sword. Father would not be pleased if he did that. "I need to impress her, not have her for dinner!"</p><p> </p><p>Envy scoffed. "Why do you even bother with a puny human like her? She is beneath you."</p><p> </p><p>Wrath was ready to tear his hair out. "Come on, anybody. Just give me something useful!"</p><p> </p><p>"I can give you some tips," said Lust. "There are plenty of ways to impress a woman."</p><p> </p><p>"None of which should be used when you have just met! And some of them shouldn't be used at all!" snapped Wrath. Honestly, they were no help at all. He might as well try his luck on his own. What's the worst that could happen?</p><p> </p><p>He came back hours later with a red imprint of a palm on his cheek. "Not a word," growled, once he caught sight of the amusement on the other Homunculi.</p><p> </p><p>"She's a perfect fit for you Wrath," said Lust snickering. "If you manage not to offend her again."</p><p> </p><p>Wrath groaned. There were times he really hated his family.</p>
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